"suppose it topples over under its weight of bomb-shaped baubles? suppose it harbors wood-borers which will migrate to the furniture? there is something ghastly about a tree-its look of many-limbed paralysis, its shaggy and conscienceless aplomb-encountered in the open, let alone in the living room. at night, you can hear it rustling and slurping water out of the bucket."
- number 4 ("o tannenbaum") from john updike's the twelve terrors of christmas
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